Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
