your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
