I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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