redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
