if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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