is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I am one with the molecules
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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