Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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