he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
