operation have a gay friend backfired
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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