You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
