people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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