I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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