I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
You know, be my cock's hype man.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
