you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
