I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
