So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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