they need to just BURY HIM!
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I have fence marks all over my body
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