i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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