Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
