My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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