This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
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