i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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