Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
