found the other keg... it's in the tree
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
