so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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