i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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