WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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