margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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