I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
