And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize