dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
