Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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