You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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