I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Randomize
