If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize