I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
