Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
