Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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