The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
