Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Randomize
