ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
