your room smells of hookers.
And success
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
