College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
