I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Me too!
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
