p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
