Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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