He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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