We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
