You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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