return my video game
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
