JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
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